the boulevard of broken dreams

Life this days...

2005-10-26T20:29:00.000+08:00

Well have not been blogging for a long time again..lol dunno y also..just feel quite sian..recently have slight problem with my parents...its not really problem but i just find them quite irritating at times...seems like wat ever i do will not pls them and its getting on my nerves...i go out too often they make noise say no sense of belonging..i stay home they say i play too much game...WTF...than wat to now..now holiday sia...do tutorial ar...xiao i dun even do tut during school time...but oh well they are my parents after all..just feel constraint at home...
Oh ya my dad ask mi set up web site for him for his business..i need some help here anyone know dream weaver pls contact mi..got money to be made..louis or hang interested??

Major project started one month liao and i think we are going no where...die sia y last yr still so slack,,my fren all last yr chiong for results man...damn totally not competitive at all...think thats my weakness...today went to school and wow everyone is doing their lab work except us...feel kind of weird and worried too...must start soon man..will call up the supplier tomorrow..dig the fomulation out from him..if not threaten to kill him..wahaa joke..really must start working hard...must find some way to find the fomulation..think i am quite lazy,...dun wanna do the old fashion way of try and error but always go for shortcut..wrong attitude sia..but no choice thats mi...

LOL recently one of my fren told mi he finally kiss a girl..way to go bro..ang moh somemore..haha

well school starting in 2 weeks time and kind of miss school..have been working and ya kind of sucky life..wanan just stay home and slack without ppl breathing down my back...

well her birthday is coming and yup have put aside some money for her stuff...damn wat to buy for her is a headache man..must go with my bros to buy her stuff..get more ideas...tomorrow meeting her to ice skate too..wahaha cannot make it think i last ice skate is like 10 yrs ago...damn wat a long time sia..but think it will be fun..looking forward to it man..

well come to the sad part...in short still will not give mi...haha..had coffee with her just now and as usual was GREAT!!!lol..thats all for now i guess...will blog again but dunno when..

Moody

2005-10-07T02:17:00.000+08:00

wanna blog but got no mood right now..lots of thoughts racing through my mind...mostly abuot her...some things that i got to accept and live with it and ya times we spent together but cant help feeling down again..y are things so difficult between us..hmm i wonder...but will not give up..ya will still try...ahh sian..think go sleep la...nitez...

lord pls clear my doubts..

2005-10-03T01:00:00.000+08:00

Hi...woke up early this morning...had light breakfast in the morning than went to church..was early today...KS join mi at church today...both of us are non-christian maybe just go church to be a better person...hope so man..well they talk about stupidity of judas. self integrity and self justification...but todays service was quite scary..there was this lady that was half laughing and half crying...got quite startled when she started..i jsut close my eyes when i hear this...hoping she would stop...but she went on like this for a while..maybe the presense of god was strong at that time....about 12 took cab down to expo to work as the mascot...quite ok la only wore the suite for 1 and half hour..haha but as usual perspire like mad..and my forehead think got abit of blister...but who cares the pays not bad got 180 for 3 days job..lolgonn bank in the money tomorrow..after work rush down suntec...my dads birthday...bought HP for him...than had royce chocolate..very nice man...

hmmm this few day she seems kind of sad..dun know wats wrong but hope she is doing fine...think must be something really great coz its been bothering her for the pass 6 mths...well gonna see her this tuesday at chalet...hope to have dinner soon...

hmmm...feeling quite screw up right now...but will not side track right KS...think those reading this will not understand but its not meant to be understood either so dun ask mi wat happen...think its just poor timing thats all..srry to hear wat happen...hope everythings all right now...well gonna sleep now..tomorrow got to go fuking school man...sian...but will meet up with my buddies tomorrow..so not too bad..hope tomorrow is a suny day....will hope is a good day...nitez all

hmmm..am i oversensitive

2005-09-30T01:10:00.000+08:00

hmm..gonna blog again..went out with my bros just now..to our usual place payer coffee bean..lol the strength this time quite alot..arliew, arwei,arseng,arsiang,arhang,arshun and mi arboi..lol lame sia the name...than just talk talk there..haha mi and siang curious sia..wanan go see see man..BRING US THERE arseng..LOL..than did not talk much to her today..felt abit distance..am i oversensitive??..hmm hope i am..maybe did something which piss her off i dunno..did not meet her this week she quite busy with her church stuff hoefully can get to meet up more next week...

Hmmm...gonna work this friday saturday and sunday..at expo food fair as a mascot..wahaha gonna be fuking hot man wearing that stupid costume but who cares right..its 10 bucks an hour...ya man quick cash..need the money man...damn bet soccer yesterday chelsea u suck la..gonna bet again on EPL hope they win man...if not sell body liao..wahaha not that bad...

die its 1 plus liao and still cant get to sleep tomorrow waking up at 9 gonna play basketball in the morning be4 work..got a feeling its just gonna be mi and siang man..the rest will be so damn late..late pay fine ar guys..lol..think gonna play some games now hopefully can sleep by 2 if not tomorrow faint man while wearing the costume...wahaha...nitez...

oh ya...

2005-09-28T10:30:00.000+08:00

Emily-hey thanks for those advise u gave mi..always there to talk to mi when i am down..haha..great to have ya as fren..but always no chance to talk to each other ar...holland v also..lol u talk at that table i talk in another table...onnline also like that..i think i always mia right until u cant take it than go sleep..lol srry about that..wrong timing..

Fendy-hey...eat some pork la...tell u the geylang pork spare part is damn solid man...haha kiding la later ur halah angry sia..always do my project for mi ar..thanks man...sometime lazy la..but had an agreement right u do the paper work i cover the practical part for u..and dun always ask mi for treat ok!!!...knn i no money liao..lol..kidding...

mel-hey sis...busy with work this few weeks huh..think dun really know wat happen to u after we had coffee that day..hope things are fine or u change bf liao..lol dun think u are like that right..always try to solve the problem rether than run away thats wat i like about ya...kopi soon....

Things got better

2005-09-28T10:09:00.000+08:00

yup things got better today..i mean yesterday...wanted to blog last night but cant..LOL was on the phone with "her" for almost 3 hrs...also dunno wat we talk about but we just talk..think it was almost 3 am when suddenly the phone went dead...haha the phone cant take it and decided to die on mi...well but had a great chat with her...hmmm like i told ya in those letters even though we dun share the same belief but i will not give up hope u dun give up on us too...

went out with KS and NIck on Monday to chat...Monday was a bad day..so did my fren KS so went out...makes mi feel like the old times where just the 3 of us..LOL think that time was great..and ya the other WB members(wooden bench my grp of close frens) went KL and did not tell us..wat the fuk la...go alone...i also wanna go lo...but oh well...oh ya monday went to watch the myth think its not bad show for jackie chan..not as typical as his other shows...and for once i think indian is hot...wahaha the girl in the movie was..

Nick-if u are seeing this bro be careful hor...dun "screw up" ur life..LOL know wat i mean..

KS-hey going through a bad time now may seem tough but think u coping well man..u KS right nothing too diff for ya..exam dun need luck one right..haha bastard...but than if u decided on something than dun turn back..think should move on with life with ur face looking forward not just move on and u looking back all the time...and for girls like fel and nic know wat to do ar dun later u get urself into shit again..especially fel haha terror sia...

Brian-hey my nigga..fuking big size fren..from a 3 chin 2 neck downgrade to a 2 chin 1 neck..lol lost a lot of weight sia...lol those things we talk about on the train is keep it mum ar.. and i will zip my mouth too..hope things go ur way man...

well got to read up my proposal got interview at 5...cya ppl..

Decision made..

2005-09-26T02:13:00.000+08:00

Hmm....think she made a decision already...yup and respect it..think its not easy on her too..but cant help feeling down...cant lie to myself and convert to christian too...dun think thats a right thing to do..think theres no one to blame for that maybe blame it on fate..LOL wat a joke...arrgghh no mood to blog now also..Nitez

finally blogging now....

2005-09-19T10:50:00.000+08:00

Hello..lazy to blog for pass few days la...haha so yup gonna blog for the pass few days event...also forget where i stop...well to start i think school is great coz there is no school..hahaha best man everyday lag lag dun have to take 3 damn bus to school...but our major project started already so gotto start working again...

yup 2 of my good frens went civil defence liao...best part is they book in for 3 days and they are out again...wat the fook right..damn good life...best man..

well she went hong kong for 10 days and the night b4 i had night cycling...so was kind of shag out. but the worst thing was i forgotten she flying off next day..think she got kind of piss..call her be4 she fly off dun wanan pick up message also dun wanan reply..wah damn bad day...how can forget such a thing..but thank god she talk to mi online the next day and kind of solve the misunderstanding..phew..she is not petty at all..think if other girls will give mi hell liao...and ya meeting her on friday..and if u are reading this hope u will be surprise when u reach singapore..LOL...still waiting...saturday went east coast for activities with church fren..the sun was great at first but after a few hours not that great after all...everyone got burnt..but it was quite fun all play together..but when i reach home that night got high fever think not enough water and my body was seriously burnt up so could not go church the next day...next will definitely go..still trying to accept...well today is a monday..4 more days be4 she return...looking forward to it...but today is a project day..fendy coming my house do project..and he is damn late lo think still sleeping...anyway go play some games first..see ya..

I will be waiting...

2005-09-11T01:09:00.000+08:00

hello have not blog for long...damn wrote a long blog and accidentaly deleted it...wat the fook man...anyway went wild wild wet and sent my application there hope can get to work there..think would be pretty fun...haha yup and still waiting for her..dunno wat sign she waiting for...hmm pondering...went service today and the pastor ask us those who believe in god to step forward..i did not do it... dunno y too...maybe still not use to it man...and its all too spiritual for mi...think i cant just live a simple life...need more than that..cant imagine ppl giving up a high pay job to do voluintary work...maybe different character...

tomorrw gonna have dinner with her with ken too..great huh...than monday gonna have dinner with her sis..haha gonna get disturb man..prepared for it...lookinf forward to tomorrow...but got to wake up damn early...oh my god..anyway wanna game a little while...see ya..will blog again..

Had a great time

2005-09-05T11:22:00.000+08:00

Haha..ya man sunday was nice..went church in the morning..a bit the boring la..but quite ok stil..did not kow y went down the stage too..felt a bit funny than wanted to go back my seat..wahaha..kely farnie sia..see mi in the mornig start laughing liao...wat the...than came lunch...ate with some church fren than met her for a drink..went down to taka coffee club there..think we sat there for 3 hr plus...talk about everything..than we made a move and walk to other places..walk round taka a few rounds too..haha..than tal about us..anyway hope that ur sign post will be a positive one from god and yup will be waiting...think dun really wanna say anymore..keep it to myself better.haha gonna meet my fren make IC now...than going gym than think having supper with her and her frens...oh ya think gonna have supper with her sis sometimes this week...LOL...k gotta go...bye

Beaming from ear to ear...wahaha

2005-09-03T01:46:00.000+08:00

hello...had a test this mornig think it suck lo...did not do one whole part of the test...HPLC and all that crap..anyway its over man and had a super boring MP briefing..wah but hey things got interesting after that..haha went lunch with her and yup abit bit awkward but than just try to talk lo..think lunch was good...than she got to go prayer meeting so went to meet my fren..had a talk with him some guy to guy sharing session..haha he got problem again with this girl..appareantly this girl got 60 bfs can u believe it..how amazing can ppl get nowadays...tsk tsk..anyway came home went jogging and some weights than she went online..had a chat with her and i think it was a very good talk...hha know each other better and stuff...think will not share it here..hahabut i think the talk was very meaningful to both of us...anyway sunday gonna go out...looking forward to it....damn think i am having a fever man..its damn cold now...brrrrrr!!!!tomorrow still got to work...sucks...think really tired..so many things wanan say but just cant put it in words..think will continue tomorrow..haha...good nitez all..shao qi lai...

Time 12.47

2005-09-02T00:40:00.000+08:00

Hey its 12.41 bed time soon..just wanna blog for a litle while be4 i hit the sack...quite tired today...body is aching slightly form the gym yesterday...went to jog today and think sprain my ankle..kind of pain now..haha my dad bought 4 box of mooncake home...but too bad on diet so did not eat any..but the york looks good man,,yum..yup and than watch super star..kelly should win man,,think she was great but weilian is not as bad..good voice too...man the best part came after the show i was damn shag and my fren told mi got to hand in a report tomorrow..shit lo got to chiong the report..than just finish..haha power chiong sia...oh ya did talk just now although for a while only... she was helping her fren film some stuff just now...think should be quite farnie..she promise mi she will send a copy to mi..wahaha great...tomorrow gonna luinch with her thats another great thing too...lol...anyway think meeting my fren after lunch than she got to go filimg again..so ya think i will be signing out now...see ya tomorrow...bye all...wan an!!!!!

just another day

2005-08-31T22:29:00.000+08:00

Yup here i am again..just came back fromt he gym..qutie intense..train with some church frens today... learn quite alot from them think will go with them again..my hands are damn tight now..

well in the morning as usual went to work..i tell u man malays at my work place are so damn lazy lo..they slep during work..than during busy period they MIA..fuk up man..hate it and they make the most noise...today was quite busy only manage to have my lunch at 4 like that..haha was famish man...than after work went to the gym..yup thats about it...

haiz cute girl..dun have to be so stress lo..like i said just let things flow and see where it leads u to...hate to see u like that...think u seldom smile this few days right...dun because of the things that is happenning right now affect u..think it should be a happy thing rather than something which bother u so much...do talk to someone u really trust like jen...see wat she says about it..than ya see ya at sunday church..haha looking forward to it..oh shit have not done my virtual field trip..anyone done it yet..let mi reference.,.lol...

Celebration and more celebration

2005-08-31T00:02:00.000+08:00

Lol today hada great day...had 2 birthday celebration...one is fendi my good fren from poly..turn 19 only still small boi man..and louis my wooden bench commitee turn 20 liao same as mi...fendi ate so many things today sia...think tomorrow got to go gym man...but had a really great time today...happy birthday guys...lol but both birthday boi did not receive their present...fendi one max forget to bring...ass sia..than louis one we forget to buy..haha dunno who to blame..wah today fierce sia paid back max and hanwei money..total 200...lucky i work if not dunno how to pay them also..thanks man for lending mi when i need it...

Man KS today clumpsy sia...wanan sabo birthday boi got spill water all over his pants..wahaha that scene was hilarious..than we went swensen to eat and had ice cream..man the left over ice cream was mixed together and 4 of us had to drink it..haha i tell u it was gross man...should have seen it...haha had it on my hp..but everyone finish it all up sporting sia..even louis hate banana he ate one big piece of it...salute..than went ktv..sang like a bunch of monkeys lo...but it was fun..haha think got sore throat already..well today spent money tomorrow earn money..got to work at 8 tomorrow..think going to sleep soon,...signing out now..se u all...

Boring night sia...

2005-08-29T22:28:00.000+08:00

Yup just came back from jogging...calf is cramping like crazy...damn pain...arggghhhh....my sis help mi do my skin and music..think its damn nice man..thanks alot...just now talking to KS about church...hey he is going church too..but for a diff reason...but i think we share the same thought...there is alot of things which we dun agree...lolx like y pastors nowadays drive big car sia..haha no offence to christian..just a thoguth thats all...anyway tonight quite sian..nothing much to do also..oh ya later got las vegas..the girls inside are quite hot..haha see if i remember to watch anot...damn tomorrow got 2 birthdays man...how to tahan..one in the afternoon one in the night...must find ways to dig money...anyone got quick monney making method..haha.kidding...yawnz...

Should have got it out of my chest a long time ago

2005-08-29T18:58:00.000+08:00

Yup here i am again...starting a new blog..the other ones for my project...lots of stuff happen man sonce i last blog..things got kind of settle down now..thank god for that..haha...ya somethings just cant be blog down...too disgracefully..but lucky there were my frens to stand by mi when i was down..thanks KS and Clement will not forget it...really hope that what ever happen is not true and just a lie to get my attention...pray to god for that...

oh yea like to thank hn wei too thanks for the money man pay u back tomorrow..haha took abit the long...anyway tomorrow is louis birthday..month of August is a killer for mi sia...thiink got so many birthdays i lost count..wahahaha..best part ppl still own mi birthday present k...haha kidding man relag...but thank all those that celebrated with mi..had a great time...

Haha still can remember that day when got drunk..my ass of a fren still took video..oh man cant believe it is mi lo..how pathetic i look..that night if remember correctly i had 15 shots of tequila, 1 drop dead and 1 noss...fuk up i tell u...puke 4 times that night...man am i weak or wat..haha oh well must experience everything right..and i never wanna be drunk again man..had a terrible day the next day..got to wake up at 7 to go school..haha surprise that i can still stay awake 3 of my frens stayed over my place to look after mi..scared that i puke all over the room..wahaha...

Went for sub com interview...and ya we did not get in...think they dun wan main coms to be in anymore...quite a waste la..2 yrs inside and the last yr cant join anymore...oh well..can try other stuff..oh ya can concentrate on gyming..wanna get a tone body man..but quite slack leh..eat supper and got a part time job at pizza hut..dun really have time to exercise also..think should start tonight..go jog first than so some pumping and some pull ups...

My previous part time job sux lo...attitude sucks to the core man..like i own them money like wat the fuk right....so quit went backk to work at pizza hut...even though pay is like shit but at least enjoy work there...haha so not to bad la...

hmmm girls....well use to like this girl..but than think things sis not work out due to alot of reasons...i also dunno wat it is..but oh well its in the past the fuk up thing is there were lots of ppl talking about this girl and mi...like wat the fuk la find something else to do can...there was one bitch that came up to my fren and ask if i broken up with my ex..how fuk can ppl get..mind ur opwn business la...wat has it got to do with u guys..if u are my fren ok la but come on lo i dun even know who u are so stop snooping around...yup felt better after saying all this..wahahaha sound fierce ar...but hey recently notice this very nice girl..oh listening to one of the songs that she sent to mi...ok nvm...told mi she like this guy..but did not know is mi..so kept on asking her about this guy...but secretly in my heart i was like crap lo she like someone else...but after i found out she sort of like mi felt so much better..but she is having a problem now...she dun like to have a non-christian boyfren..oh man wat am i suppose to do la..haiz..hey my sis talk to mi think i should stop here..blog again later...oh ya sis i dun mean anything ar..haha coffe sooon...signing out